Forgive me Father, for I have vibed

Forgive me Father, for I have vibed

I won’t try to hide it anymore: I vibe code. I do. A freaking lot. More than I feel comfortable admitting in public. And every time I do, a sort of discomfort creeps in. A sense that I’m doing something morally dubious, like violating an unspoken code of craftsmanship. Because inside me, two forces coexist, and they rarely agree on what “good work” looks like. Like a modern-day Edward Mondrake, I too hear demonic voices whispering in my sleep. The manager The vibes make my manager instincts kick in. This part of me cares about speed. About validating ideas. About time to market. About delegating. The manager in me doesn’t get obsessed about the details. It understands that customers don’t care about code they won’t see. That perfect is the enemy of done. The prompt machine ends. The reasoning storm stops. The manager, arms crossed, looks at the outcome. Good. This is great. I can’t believe I managed to do in 20 minutes what would’ve taken a team of five an entire week. Crazy times. But… Why… Is… that useEffect there??? This is clearly DERIVED STATE!! The artisan The artisan in me cares about quality. About coherence. About beauty, even where no one else will look. About existential reasons first, money later. The crafter looks at the vibed code and chuckles. This is junior code. You’re an old man who has spent two decades in the industry writing code every day. Look at yourself in the mirror. You’re deplorable. Roll up your sleeves and do the fucking work, you lazy bastard. That useEffect gets immediately obliterated. It needed to be derived state, and the variable namings are also weird all over the place. God, this is going to take a while, but it’s worth the effort. Let’s do this. And now that I’m here, maybe I could refactor this other despising block of sheer vibery that crept in somehow. This is good. I feel like myself again. Wheeew. I just spent the entire afternoon in monk mode. And then the manager knocks: Dude, you just invested 4 hours of your time doing NOTHING. Have you seen the roadmap? Step aside, I think I’ll just prompt my way out of this refactor. And so the circle repeats. Endlessly. Precariously. Hilariously. Where this leaves me (us?) I refuse to believe I’m the only poor soul caught in this absurd, self-inflicted torment. Others must be out there, questioning their seniority or skills in the face of technology so powerful it bends reality around it. A technology that’s indistinguishable from magic—but magic from a Terry Pratchett universe (the blue color indicates an intentional em dash). A universe where wizards cast their spells using flimsy wands, mutter half-formed incantations, and lopsided aberrations materialize out of thin air. Here’s your all-powerful dragon! A dragon that flies for five minutes in utter agony before begging you to end its suffering. And the wizard in you just sighs. Because it knows exactly what comes next: fix its malformed wings, reorganize its guts, invent a digestive system it never asked for. Because somehow, unbelievably, that’s what it means to be a programmer in 2025. Forgive me Father, for I vibed. And I will vibe again. Because the magic is flawed, the outcome uncertain. But hey, at least I got myself a fucking dragon.

Dec 08